Showing posts with label The Caitie Diaries. Show all posts
Showing posts with label The Caitie Diaries. Show all posts
mental health 2021 goals
Mental health 2021 goals

Hey Stranger,

Long time, no see. It’s been a while since I sat in front of my laptop and just typed. I feel a little rusty if I’m honest so bare with me. To say this year has been a roller coaster would be an understatement. Amid all the painful moments there were a handful worth celebrating. I think we can all agree it's for the best to put last year behind us.

I struggled a lot with my mental health last year and ended up cutting back on a lot of the things I loved doing. I took a long break from social media and blogging when things got too much and then felt a little out of my depth when I wanted to come back. One thing I missed the most was being creative and producing content. One of my goals for 2021 is to be consistent with my content. 

A lot has happened since I last wrote a blog post. One of those things is I’m now working as a journalist. Me! This is something I have been dreaming about since I was in year 11. It’s a completely new field for me and I’m really enjoying it. Writing about more formal topics at work has made me miss what I was writing about when I was blogging. This space has been a place for me to write about beauty, fashion, books and my favourite places in London. A lot of the things that “fed my soul”, if you will, ended up closing during the lockdowns and in the new tiered system. I wasn't very good at finding alternatives, that I could to, to all those things.

The pandemic threw more than I realised and one thing I'm focusing on this year is my mental health. Last year taught me how important a good mental health is in being able to function. After all, we’re only human and we can only take so on much.

Here’s a couple of things I’ll be doing to look after my mental health this year:
  • Be kinder to myself. Funnily enough, I wrote a blog post on this and never followed any of it. I can count on one hand how many times I have been kind to myself this year. It’s quite shocking really. As the pandemic continues, I’m going to have to rethink what things I can do to bring me happiness since what I used to do has been put on pause. Taking it easier and not putting so much pressure on myself are my two priorities. 
  • Have more ME time. For the whole year, I have felt that my time belonged to someone else. I think that’s been a big cause of my anxiety. This year, I’m focusing on taking ‘protected’ time out for just me. I started doing it last Autumn and it really helped. Essentially, Sunday will belong to me. For that day, I will do whatever I want to do whether it’s catching up on my latest read, creating content or going for a nice stroll. The most important thing is feeling as though that time belongs to me and no one else.
  • Be creative. I thrive on creativity. It’s one of the reasons why I wanted to make writing my career. I used to bake, cook, write, read, and film. I loved it all! I mentioned earlier that I stopped  doing those things when everything got a little too much. Really, I should have kept those things going. 

Love, Aoife xo


Girl sitting in a cafe

If everything went according to plan, on the 21st July, I would have walked across a stage collecting my degree. On my feet would have been a pair of Jimmy Choo’s I had been saving up for, for this exact moment. However, no part of 2020 has gone according to plan and instead I spent the day as any other day. 

It’s been three years since I moved to Portsmouth to start my Journalism degree and it feels absolutely surreal to say I made it to the end. I haven't shared my whole journey online but you can see highlights on Instagram and Twitter (@aoifecaitrionax). In my first year of university, I felt very lonely and I struggled to make friends. Like anyone, I signed up to almost every society I had a remote interest in. First year is all about trial and error so don't be afraid to make mistakes. 


Second year came along and I was stuck living in a house that lived on drama and animosity. It wasn't very fun or healthy but I learnt a lot about myself during that time. The main one being how to stand up for myself. Academically and career wise, I was starting to get ahead and had articles printed in local news websites. When final year came around, I promised myself that this would be a year I could be proud of. And I am. Despite the ups and downs, which as a uni student you will know, I have met some amazing people who are now my friends and made memories that will stick with me for life. 


Aside from the academic side to university, there are plenty of important lessons to learn outside of lectures and seminars. So here’s what university really taught me and what I wish I knew before starting:


Use your time wisely. And by that, nothing is waiting around for you. At university, you have a lot of time on your hands when you’re not in lectures, seminars or working. Use that spare time productively. I spent a lot of time in my first year blogging and making videos on YouTube. Unfortunately, I slowed down in second year and lost motivation in third year. I regret not believing in myself more and sticking to it. I really recommend using your spare time productively by taking up a new skill, hobby, or searching for internships and grad schemes. 


Do something you’re passionate about. University is a lot more fun when you’re passionate about the subject you’re studying. I wrote essays on feminism, did presentations on the fashion industry and put together video packages which I had a lot of fun doing. I really enjoyed the work and the skills I was learning with it. There were a few late and stressful nights but I wouldn’t change a thing because I was still doing something I loved. I've spoken to my friends and other people about it who all agreed that you should be studying something you're passionate about and interested in. It will be a greater experience and you'll enjoy it more.


Make the most out of the University services. There are so many services that universities offer these days and I'm pretty sure, you're not even aware of half of them. I struggled a lot when I moved back home for lockdown and my anxiety was at an all time high. My lecturer recommended that I reach out to the wellbeing team to get some additional support. To be honest, I don't know if I would have finished university without the support and weekly session from a councillor. Most universities also offer academic support with essays or career support. We pay a lot of money attending university so we may as well take advantage of what it offers.


Neon light against flower wall

(Money management) How to have fun on a low budget. Regardless of whether you have the maximum grant or the lowest grant, we all struggle with our money at some point. In your first year, you make bad money decisions and by final year, you’ve decided to go vegan because it’s cheaper and save all your money instead. Social life is a big part of university. Clubbing at uni has never been my scene but I still went out for lunches, dinners, day trips and everywhere else with my friends. This all adds up. However, by the end of the whole experience you've learnt how to have fun on a low budget.


It's not a race but it's not a marathon either. Your grades are not everything at univeristy. Sure, they're important because you need to pass to move up a year and you want a good degree classification. But, they're not the be all and end all. Lecturers are looking for how you engage with the content. My highest scoring essays were down to referencing different scholars and sharing ideas and theories. You're not in a race with anyone because you're not competing with them. Getting a degree is something you do for yourself and a personal journey. 


Good luck! And if you've already been, what did you learn at university?


Love, Aoife xo 

Girl reading The Sun and Her Flowers by Rupi Kaur

The last few months have not been easy. Being in lockdown has been a challenge for us all but for some of us, it has been an even bigger battle. One thing that came out of my recent therapy sessions is that I need to be kinder to myself. I need to learn how to be confident in myself and not see my weaknesses as completely detrimental. 

    Since then, I've been on a little journey of self-confidence in learning how to identify unhealthy behaviours and make them healthier. I think we all need to not just be kinder to ourselves, but learn how to  instead. We can be kinder to ourselves by treating ourselves to a bar of chocolate or a new Dior bag. However, that's only short term. By 'learning', we can create long term healthy habits. Here are four tips that can help boost self-confidence:


Be proud of what you’ve achieved- How often do you stop and reflect on what you’ve achieved? I can’t remember the last time I did that and that’s an issue. We continue to achieve every single day and that should be recognised. I don’t think about what I have overcome or really acknowledge all the amazing things I’ve done in the past three months. And they’re a pretty big deal. I just graduated with first class honours, woah! As humans, we tend to have the habit of chasing one thing after another, never really feeling fulfilled at what we’ve already done. When you have a moment, think about everything you have done in the past week, month or even year. The most important thing is that you can smile about it and think, I did that.


Don’t put too much pressure on yourself- Do you know what’s human? Making mistakes. No one is that perfect and if they are, they’re lying. In order to be kind to ourselves, we have to allow room for errors. We’re going to get things wrong from time to time and that’s how we learn and overcome it. By putting so much pressure on ourselves, we’re missing the opportunity to learn and grow from experiences. And Rome wasn’t built in a day. Things take time and they’ll take as long as they need to.


Rupi Kaur The Sun and Her Flowers


Accepting you don’t have complete control over everything that happens- Anxiety often stems from a lack of control. In situations where we’re not in control, we often feel anxious. I get waves of anxiety that tend to last a few weeks to a few months. I guess it never really goes away but I’ve learnt how best to manage it, if you will. One thing I always get told is to focus on what I can and am able to control. This can be quite difficult in some situations especially where we feel helpless. Take the coronavirus, we can’t control that or being in lockdown but we can control how we choose to act and use our time now that we’re at home more often than not. We can control some things and we can’t with others. Finding a balance is really helpful and focusing on what we can control.


Treat yourself- I’ll admit that use those two words a lot normally. I only realised the impact of not treating yourself when I starved myself of that. Pre-lockdown,  I’d treat myself by going shopping or buying artisan doughnuts (so so good). But since we went into lockdown and I was struggling with everything including really bad acne, I stopped. I stopped feeling worthy of myself and stopped being kind to myself. One way you can treat yourself Covid friendly is to buy flowers. Flowers can make all the difference by brightening up the space and making the room feel happier. My Nan said to buy flowers for someone when they’re sad and that’s a good lesson to remember. So, whether it’s your favourite doughnut, flowers or something pink (my happy colour), remember to treat yourself and do things that make you smile. 


Love, Aoife xo


I love Valentine’s Day probably more than I should as a single lady. I’m a hopeless romantic and Valentine’s day is all about showing your appreciation and love for someone. Any excuse to demonstrate this and to celebrate something, I’m always up for it. I love the story behind Valentine’s day too and how the priest wrote letters to the jailer’s daughter signing it ‘Love, your Valentine’. This year got me thinking about love languages, what they mean and what mine is.

In 1992, Gary Chapman wrote a book called The Five Love Languages: How To Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate. It outlines five ways in how people express and experience love between romantic partners. I, personally, think this works a little in how we express love and gratitude to family members and friends as well. It's how we interact with one another.

The five languages are (according to 5lovelanguages.com):
- Receiving Gifts: “A gift says, ‘he was thinking about me’"
- Quality Time: “Giving your spouse your undivided attention.”
- Words of Affirmation: “Using words to build up the other person.”
- Acts of Service: “Doing something for your spouse that you know they would like. Such as cooking a meal, washing dishes, vacuuming floors etc.”
- Physical Touch: “Holding hands, hugging, sexual intercourse, are all expressions of love.”

According to Chapman, we have a primary love language that speaks more deeply to us and a secondary love language. If you’re not sure what your love language is, there are plenty of quizzes and tests online you can take for free. But it's ultimately about which one you can relate to the most.


My primary love language is Acts of Service with my second language as Physical Touch. I think it’s important to demonstrate your love and gratitude through doing nice things for others such as helping them out and doing something that needs to be done. I also relate to Physical Touch as I love giving hugs and I crave them too. I also like holding hands and even sitting close by to someone and feeling their presence too.

Knowing your love language and your partner’s love language, according to the experts, can help make your relationship stronger because you know each other on a deeper level. Whenever I ask people about what they’re doing for Valentine’s, they also go ‘I’ll get a card and some chocolates or flowers’. Gifts can be very thoughtful and I don’t know anyone who’s ever said no to chocolates. But, why don’t you learn about your partners love language and celebrate Valentine’s doing something they’d appreciate more such as spending quality time with them, doing acts of service or building them up etc?

What is your love language and do you believe in them?

Love, your Valentine xo

Every now and then, I like to switch it up a little bit and do something different. The other day I watched an interview on YouTube with Ari Lennox and Summer Walker. It was a short conversation talking about all the things they’re “over” in light of Summer Walker’s latest album, Over It. If you haven’t listened to it, it’s amazing and has been on repeat ever since it came out.

I thought I'd take a leaf out of their book... okay, I'm just doing it in blog post form... and have my own go discussing what I'm over and what is not coming with me into the new year...

Drama…

A lot of drama comes from miscommunication and in a world with more streams of communication than ever before, why do we still suck at communicating? We have so many privileges that other people don’t have so why are we still afraid of sharing our feelings? Also, I have never had as much drama in my life as I currently do now. Life was so much simpler when there wasn’t drama. Let’s leave it to Eastenders, please. 

…over it

Body Hair…

Regrowth after a day, razor burn, cut legs... body hair grows back so quickly and it gets darker and darker each time. I’m over it completely. It’s the bane of my existence and it needs to not be. I don’t know how I’m going to do it but I’m leaving my body hair in 2019.

…over it


People’s opinions on my love life...

Do you have a boyfriend yet? No. You’re so picky, you’ll never find anyone. I’m sorry, what? One of the things I’m over more than anything is people’s opinions on my love life. Since when was it ever out in the open and up for debate? When I am emotionally ready to bare my deepest feelings and am ready to receive someone else’s, I will let you know. But until then, I’ll do me and you can sort your own love life out.

...over it.

Acne…

I’m starting to believe my skin has a mind of its own. No matter what I do or what I don’t do, there is always a pimple. A mark. A blemish. I’m tired of looking at my skin and seeing red marks everywhere. As much as I’m tired of acne, I’m also tired of all the work it takes to try and get rid of it. Spot cream, serum, moisturiser, natural remedies; I’m starting to think that either my skin is as stubborn as I am or it’s all just a marketing ploy. I don’t do anything to it and it explodes. 

….over it.


This post has been fun to write and if you’re a fellow blogger, give it a try and tag me in them. I’d love to see them! These four things are sadly the significant things that go round and round in my life and create the most negative energy. I predict that 2020 will be a great year. There are lots of great things happening such as graduating from university and (fingers crossed) getting my dream graduate job and a ton more things. Maybe I’ll fall in love? Maybe I’ll move into my own place? Maybe I’ll make more friends? The list of possibilities is endless.


Happy 2020 guys!!!

Love, Aoife xo

I have never been one of those people who are obsessed with candles. I never understood the attraction or appeal to a pot of wax and a flame. However, my knowledge and understanding of candles completely flipped when I received a candle that -no exaggeration- has changed my life. This candle is not only a beautiful specimen to look at but once lit transforms a cold dreary space to a warm cosy sensual space. 

I have never experienced anything like a Jo Malone candle. And yes, I said candle and experience in the same sentence because it most definitely is one. There is always a lot of hype when it comes to Jo Malone products especially by influencers but I can 100% confirm, it’s worth the hype. In the same way, nothing compares to taking a designer bag out of its dustbag, nothing compares to lighting a Jo Malone candle.


I received the candle as a birthday present and as soon as I lifted the lid off the candle, the scent had already enveloped me. The candle is the Velvet Rose & Oud Home candle and comes in all-black packaging with matte black wax and wick with a silver lid. Everything about it screams luxury even down to the matte black matches.


I’m not good at describing the scent but according to the website it says, “transform the atmosphere with the scent of darkest Damask rose. Wrapped with smoky out wood. Spiked with clove, decadent praline.” The scent is incredible when the candle isn’t even lit. And when it is, it’s extraordinary. The whole room is soon smelling of the greatest things in life. The wood and cloves give it a warm comforting feeling. 

I’m convinced that Jo Malone is a scent extraordinaire. Everything about the candle exudes luxury and elegance. And, I’m here for it. 

Love, Aoife xo

If you liked this post, you might like What is your Love Language?


In my first year of university, I wrote a post in line with the American holiday of Thanksgiving and shared all the things I was thankful for. It also happens to be one of my more popular posts. The post has weighed heavily on my mind ever since and I felt like I owed it myself to write another one. 

Reading over it again today, I feel quite proud of the person who wrote it. At that moment in time, I had started university, moved away from home and quite frankly had no clue whatsoever what I was doing.

Two years later, not much has changed. I still don’t know exactly what I’m doing but I do know that every day I’m doing something I love and am passionate about. So, there’s that. I know I’m stealing blog post ideas from myself but I wanted to write another one because there is so much that goes on in life that we can forget all the great things that have happened and we’re able to do. And, I just want to take a moment to share and reflect. 



The first thing I am grateful for, like in the last one, is for all the opportunities that have come my way. And like back then, I took them with both hands. Over the summer, I had the internship of my dreams at Marie Claire. Where I was given actual responsibilities. All the people I met were incredibly nice and the atmosphere was so welcoming. I’ve made lots of new contacts which that in itself is amazing. 

I am eternally grateful to have the privilege of travelling. I love travelling to different places, exploring different cultures and trying the local delicacies. Every summer, I save up and travel somewhere new. This summer was no different. I went to Venice with my friend in August and I absolutely loved it. We explored every inch of the islands, weaving in and out of alleyways, and crossing bridges. I didn’t quite realise at the time, but Venice is sinking and who knows if it’ll still be there by the time I have kids or have grandchildren? But, I have a million memories to share with them.


Lastly, I am thankful for having such amazing friends who have been an absolute rock this past year, especially the ones who gave me their shoulder when I cried. And there were a lot of sleep deprived tears falling. I am thankful for the ones who took me on therapy sessions to Tesco. To the ones who called me up and motivated me when I needed it. And, for all our lunches at Las Iguanas. 

The past year has taught me a million lessons about life and myself. Life will not always be the happy dreamland I thought I could get stay in. Sometimes it’s a lot harder than that. One thing I’ve learnt is how incredibly strong we all are. Even though it doesn't feel like it, we will never be faced with something we can’t handle. It just requires a little digging to find the strength you need.

What are you grateful for this year?

Aoife xo


The French have a saying, “La vie appartient Ă  ceux qui se lèvent tĂ´t,” which in English means “Life belongs to those who rise early!” Now, while I agree that waking up at 6AM gives you the whole day to use to be as productive as you can, sometimes you can be just as productive waking up a little later. 

As a third-year student, I have lists upon lists coming out of my ears of all the things I need to do. Even more so as a journalism student. I'm only in two days a week so the other three days are used for chasing up people for interviews, research and writing. Sounds simple but it's really not and fellow writers and journalism students will understand, especially on NCTJ accredited courses. 

Regardless of whether you're on top of your game, or in the pits of despair, procrastination will inevitably set in. I've come up with four tips and tricks to help you stay motivated, productive and less stressed. And to help push procrastination back a few hours.


ONE // Make realistic to-do lists

This was something I figured out quite early on. I would make myself a to-do list with everything I wanted to do and when the day finished I hadn’t even completed the first thing. Sometimes to-do lists are full of really big things that require a lot more time than we have to give to it. Instead of listing all the big projects that need completing, specify the parts that need doing. When you break them down into smaller tasks, they become more manageable and you’ll be ticking a lot more things of your to-do list.

TWO // Set the time

Setting yourself working hours encourages you to use those hours productively. I procrastinate less when I know I have a couple of hours of free time in the evening. The amount of work that needs doing will increase and fluctuate throughout the year but I find it helpful to set a cut off point to allow my mind to reset. I usually stop working at 6ish but I might continue on longer if I’m in the zone and happy. 



THREE // Get Active

A lot of the work I set myself is mind-based, getting active and working out is exercise for the body and allows your mind time to have a little break. A lot of my procrastination tactics involve doing something physical so this tip really helps me to focus. Whether its a walk around the block or workout at the gym, both are just as beneficial. After all, it's important to keep a happy body and a happy mind.

FOUR // Set Incentives

Sometimes we need a little incentive to help motivate us in reaching our goals. Of course, knowing you’ll reach that goal is an incentive in itself. But a little help along the way just sweetens the deal. For example, I told myself if I went to the gym consistently for two weeks then I'd buy myself some more sportswear. Or if I posted consecutively on my blog, I'd buy myself some Air Force 1's. And let's just say, I have a new pair of trainers and I've earned myself some new gym wear. 


What tips and tricks do you do to help you be more productive? Comment Below x

Love, Aoife xo

One of the things I love about living away at university is having freedom in the kitchen. With my own budget and only myself to feed, I have freedom in what I can buy and what I can make. And, I love to take advantage of it every day. My new found freedom and the added fact of how much I hate that student stereotype (which sadly wiped out the number of times I ate my favourite type dish, pasta *sad face*), I became motivated to try new things. 

So, how does a falafel salad equate to trying new things? Compared to the simple diet I had back home, a falafel salad is something I wouldn’t really have. I have been trying to introduce more vegetarian based meals into my diet and the occasional vegan one. I find they taste much better than normal meat meals. Plus, there is so much more you can do when meat is not involved.

When I made this salad, I wanted it to more than a bunch of dry leaves. I seasoned each part differently which really helped in adding flavour. The couscous is soft and delicate contrasting to the crispness of falafel and slight crunch in the fried peppers. It’s one of the nicest things I’ve ever made.


The couscous is mixed with Italian Style Seasoning (from Sainsbury's) and I added a little more water than usual to keep it moist. The peppers and courgettes where lightly fried and mixed with a paprika-based season mix. I love cooking Kale. It's such a versatile vegetable and I have a lot of fun making it differently. This time, I steamed it and mixed in some chopped garlic to give it a little taste. When it comes to cooking Kale a little tip is to massage it when you wash it. It softens the leaves up and gives it some more taste.

There’s a scene in this film called Ramen Girl where the chef serves up ramen and talks about placing the ingredients in certain places to create harmony in the dish.  Ever since then, I’ve tried to recreate a sense of harmony in my dishes. It sounds a little silly but when everything is placed just so it tastes nicer and it somehow cleanses your mind and palette before eating. I could be on some weird voodoo zen thing but try creating a sense of harmony when you serve up food.

Love, Aoife xo

To put it simply; the world is dying. This is something we’ve known about for a while. Except you probably thought that won’t happen until at least another five thousand years. That might be true but it will get a lot worse before then. If you look around, with climate change, running out of resources and even Brexit, the world is getting itself in a sticky situation. As much as the hot summers are nice, the cold winters aren’t and the dramatic weather is about to get a lot worse. 

Introducing the sustainability conversation. Whether it’s about plastics, fashion, beauty or waste, the conversation around sustainability is thriving and we’re taking action to reduce our pollution and impacts on the earth.

April marked 2019’s Fashion Revolution week. Fashion Revolution is a global movement calling for greater transparency, sustainability and ethics in the industry (taken from Fashionrevolution.org). The week marked the 6th anniversary of the Rana Plaza factory collapse in Bangladesh which killed 1,138 people and injured many more. They started the #whomademyclothes to demand greater transparency in the fashion supply chain. 

Fashion Revolution founder and creative director Orsola De Castro did a talk at my university in March. It was not only enlightening but sort of like a slap in the face. The ways in which we can help make a difference are so simple. So why aren’t we doing it already? It really is an every little help scenario, sort of like the butterfly effect.


Like me, we all need a reality check and for someone to say the things we already know. So here are some of the ways you can be a part of the sustainable fashion conversation:

Quality, get to know it. From what I’ve learnt, quality doesn’t have to be expensive. My Flatmate owns a Primark jumper from years ago and it’s still going strong. However, I think buying something a little more costly comes with a different mindset. When you buy something cheap, you see replaceable. But when you buy something a little more costly, you see durability. You paid more for something and so it won’t be treated carelessly. Being a student is slightly harder because our income is obviously limited. Therefore, a £50 white tee is clearly out of our budget. However, be smart about it. When you buy a garment, will it last endless wears and many washes? Or at least longer than a year? Two? Think quality. Quality means you won’t be in a rush to buy a replacement so quickly.

Need over want. Money in our pocket means we can buy whatever we want to. And that usually includes a quick order of cheap clothes from a fast-fashion online store. But clothes should be a desire and they should be treated as a love affair.  Every item you own should have a place and a reason to exist in your wardrobe. The top that’s been staring at you in the shop window for a while or the dress that makes you feel a million times more confident. So I challenge you, when you next go shopping, to ask yourself: “Do I need or want?” If it’s want, are you going to love it this time next week? next month? six months from now?

Mend your own clothes. I currently own three pairs of ripped jeans. On one pair, my knee has stretched the rip out so much that it looks like a giant hole in the wall. They were really cute as well and made my butt look good which can be quite hard in a mum/ boyfriend-style fit. So, I grabbed a needle, a piece of blue thread and started sewing. Clothes don’t need to be thrown away because they have a giant hole in it. Learn to mend your clothes and make the most out of them. You could even take the opportunity to add something new such as embroidery.

Swap, donate or buy second-hand. The number of people buying clothes second hand and going thrift shopping is growing. And there’s a reason. You’re helping the planet. If you haven’t tried it already, what are you waiting for? You can find some great steals there and quality brands being stocked. The great thing with charity shops is you’re also donating to a cause. Not only helping your pocket or the environment but someone else’s life too- Double whammy!

If that doesn’t sound as appealing, because not everybody wants to buy second-hand which is fine, look to buy from a sustainable designer or products made sustainably. Look beyond the clothes on the high street and look into smaller brands whose clothes are traceable and are made from sustainable materials. The ethical fashion industry is switching things up and they’re looking much more attractive than they did thirty years ago. Deakin & Blue produce amazing swimwear made from recycled fishnets. Tala workout gear is made from recycled clothes.



In summary, it’s about time we group together and start working on changing the culture. Our current culture is full of disposable elements. Our new culture needs to learn that things are here to stay and we need to learn to love our planet as much as we love the people closest to us.

The most important thing you can do is stay in the loop with the news. Be aware of the process the things in your house take to get from the earth to your possession. It’s not just about the earth but the people involved. Think of the conditions of those in the Rana Plaza factory collapse. Make a small change and pass it on.

There is nothing to lose from changing your mindset but the whole world to gain in return.


Love, Aoife xo



Maya Angelou’s poem ‘Still, I rise’ connects with me on many levels. There’s beauty between the lines and on the lines. It’s a poem about strength which at this moment in time is something I can wholeheartedly relate to.

I'm only going to mention this once more because quite frankly I've given it way more air time than it should. The last nine months has been one massive test. My living situation at university was just a bundle of tension and stress. And unfortunately, there's nothing we could really do about it. Or at least, felt safe enough to do something about it. I spoke to every possible person. I was so distracted over it that it had a negative impact on my work and at numerous points, I felt I had lost control over everything. Except I was so distracted over the living situation that I was less stressed about work. To give you an idea of the extent of the issues: camping out on your flatmate's floor to seek refuge from the antics of another flatmate was a low moment. So was checking up on said flatmate to see if she was okay after being shouted at to find her friend had come round (at 2AM) to make sure she was okay. But walking the streets late at night (11PM) holding a pillow on the way to a friends house was an even lower moment. We won’t mention the bottle of pinot pressed against my eye at 8:30 in the morning to reduce the massive bags under my eyes before my 9AM.

In every testing situation, there’s a balancing act to be done. Picture a weighing scale. On one side is the testing factor and on the other your desire to achieve the goal. The side that holds your desire should weigh down the testing factor by far. That’s how I always find motivation and determination to push through troubling times. If the scales are close to balancing then maybe your desire is wavering and you should think back to where that desire stemmed from in the first place. Nothing should take you away from what you want to achieve. It is your life and you have the right to determine what you want to do with it. 

So, in every testing situation remember that there are more important things to think about. Such as that goal you're on track to achieve. I know that can be incredibly hard to absorb especially when all you feel is anger but turn it into determination. If you need to, go to the gym and pound it out on the treadmill. It helps! 


In the words of Maya Angelou...
“Still, I rise”.

Love, Aoife xo

What is the meaning of life? You tell me.

What is the difference between right and wrong? It’s about feeling; knowing what you shouldn’t do versus the better option.

Nature or nurture? Nurture. 

Is it more important to be liked or respected? Respected. You don’t necessarily have to like someone/ thing but you can appreciate them/ it. I get really frustrated when people can’t appreciate the time and effort that goes into something.

If you could be remembered for one thing what will it be? For being passionate and encouraging others to find theirs [passion]. 

Who or what is your greatest love? Fashion. 

When did you last lie? Yesterday. A woman came up to me and I had no clue who she was but she obviously knew me. So I pretended like I knew more than I did when she spoke to me.

Does the supernatural exist? If you want it to.

Are you fatalistic? Yes. And also no. I believe we are given choices and it’s up to us to decide which ones to take. But, also, that it will all work out in the end. Even if we’ve been dealt with the wrong cards; know that it will get better.

What is your greatest fear? Being lonely. I don’t mind being alone and living by myself but to be completely lonely and have no-one. That’s quite scary.

Animals or babies? Babies. 


What talent do you yearn for? Being able to sing would be awesome.

Do you like to be complimented? Yes, who doesn’t?

Do you have a high pain threshold? Define high. Haha! I can cope with a bikini wax but that’s about the only pain I can cope with.

What book do you recommend most to others? I don’t think there’s one book that I recommend to others. Everyone I know is going through different things and has different personalities. But if I do, then it’s probably a Sophie Kinsella book.

Which lesson has been the hardest to learn? You can’t control everything and everyone. People have their own paths to follow and stuff to figure out. And not everybody will treat you with the same respect you give to others. Same, with what they do as well. 

What food sums up happiness? Thai Green curry. It smells divine and warms you up from the inside. It’s a dish full of love.

What have you never understood? People.

What is one thing you want to know before you die? The French language. 

Are you scared of dying or what happens when you die? Touchwood, that won’t happen for a while. But, isn’t everybody?

Quinoa or Quavers? Quinoa. My body is a temple and all that.


I came across these questions in the back of Stylist mag with Little Simz and I thought I’d share the philosophy too. They’ve been fun to do and if you’re a fellow blogger out there have a go and tag me in it. I’d love to see what answers everybody has. Comment below what has been your hardest lesson to learn and how you dealt with it.


Love, Aoife xo